Do not judge too soon

If your child has made a mistake, or you see something is wrong, first give your child the chance to explain. Even if it is very obvious.

There could be something you didn't know. You don't know what happened if you did not see it happening. It is very painful for being reprimanded and not being guilty. This hurts a lot. An adult will stand up for him or herself, but children can be afraid of this or do not get the chance.

It could be done by accident. Or maybe someone else did it. Do not punish your child, because your neighbor complained about your kid. Ask your child for an explanation first. And before getting mad at him or her.

An example to clear this out. I hope you can feel the wrongness. I hope it gives you a bad feeling. Because that means you have a sense for right and wrong. Here we go.

Dad came into the kitchen. Noticed his little daughter was cleaning up a overturned glass of milk on the kitchen table. He reprimanded her for the mess she has made. Later on, he discovered the baby had overturned the milk. She was only cleaning it. This is great injustice. And this hurts.

Not only didn't she do it, she showed her best side and cleaned it up. Put yourself in her shoes. If dad would have asked in a friendly way what has happened, she wouldn't have been hurt and probably complimented.

Not only do you hurt someone by accusing someone false, but you also increase the change a child is not going to show his or her best side when something similar happens. Would you?

So do not judge too soon.